Ummm I don't mean to be rude.... But wouldn't that be considered against the law if the guy is 19 and she's 14?? I know that would get the guy busted pretty bad here where I live. And I mean bad.<br /> Anyways, I think if you are truly ready and going to do it by your own choice, you can :) I mean I've had a boyfriend for four years and I have not felt that readiness yet. And just to let people know I am almost twenty one, not forty lol But if you're ready, do it of your own free will :)

I don't think you always have to love someone to have sex with them, I just think for your first time it might be better.<br /> <br /> Due to the hormones your brain releases when you do have sex, and because your first time is generally not the best experience. You don't want some dude to just come along and wreck you and then be scarred for experiences after that, as that was what happened to me. Of course i've gotten past that and can now have normal sexual encounters with my awesomely amazing boyfriend. :)<br /> <br /> I've had sex with people I don't love, just because I wanted a hook up. xD<br /> <br /> But I both agree with Kaitie and Nitrous. Except that not everyone is mature as you were when they are fourteen. Like my cousin. Not everyone is educated in practicing safe sex either.<br /> Not that the age thing matters, considering the person we're talking to is 18+. xD

Yeah I can't really say I agree with 14yr olds having sex. It's not so much emotional too but just the whole possibility of getting pregnant from that. A 14yr barely would get a chance to live life if they got pregnant. A 14yr old shouldn't have to worry about having a kid or making a decision for an abortion. There is always that risk of it unless it is a same-sex couple.<br /> <br /> I think plenty of people would say they've changed since they were 14. I'm definitely not the same and when I think back on it, I was definitely not as smart. I'll be saying this when I'm 30 and 40 and so on. I'm glad you don't regret it and that it wasn't a bad experience because that can be a little scarring for some. Our brains aren't fully grown until we are in our 20s. In the meantime our impulse control is higher and I just don't think it's wise for someone so young to open themselves up to diseases, pregnancy, and everything else that can come along with it. Again, I'm glad that it worked out fine for you and that you don't regret anything. That is good =).<br /> <br /> For the love part, I know some do it for fun, some reserve it for love but I'm not going to call anyone silly or call either way an unrealistic thing. Everyone has their choices. My choice is for love even though around certain times of the month I want to have it the other way in that moment (I won't let myself though since that is just chemicals and hormones and not my true belief).<br /> <br /> Doing something like that for love keeps the act more special to me. I am a very self conscious person and that is just one of the epitomes I can offer someone I care deeply about. I love when I'm comfortable enough to joke around during it, laugh, and have those special connections. I don't think I'd be able to keep it as anything casual. The whole idea is unappealing to me. But here's the great thing, if I don't like it, I don't have to do it! This is what everyone needs to get through their heads (country and worldwide I mean). If I don't like more casual friendly sex, then I don't have to do it! If you like casual friendly sex, then that doesn't bother me one bit and doesn't effect me. As long as it's not against any laws or endangering anyone, then it doesn't matter to me.<br /> <br /> So again, I don't agree with the whole 12-16yr sex thing.. but it's not harming me and I just hope those kids don't have regrets like your experience was. I wouldn't want them to be effected negatively by it and I just hope they know what everything entails and that it is a big decision in their life.

I guess everyone just has their own opinion and belief about sex and when to do it and such. <br /> <br /> :/<br /> <br /> Merr,,,

Uhh. I'd like to address a couple of things. I had sex at fourteen, and I was ready. I don't think for a second that I was "stupid" for doing it. Fourteen year olds, for the most part, know what they're doing. If you're here, you inevitably were one at one point so I don't get what the issue is with hindsight.<br /> <br /> I've also always been very mature for my age, and even now find nothing in common with those my own age (I have almost no friends under 21, and I'm 18.) so I certainly believe that there are fourteen year olds that aren't ready. But nineteen? That seems a little insane to me. <br /> <br /> I don't have a good relationship with three out of the four boys I've been with. But that does not for a <i>second</i> mean I regret it. Sex =/= love. As soon as people start to realize that, I think we can start to put all of this dumb "wait till you're older/love the person" sh.it. <br /> <br /> Equating sex with love is downright unrealistic and is setting you up for hurt. I haven't ever dated the kid I'm currently seeing. If I told him I loved him just because we had sex, he'd be creeped the hell out, and rightfully so! <br /> <br /> Sex doesn't need to be about love to be fun. I think when you love someone the sex is better, but to demand a strong connection with the person is limiting and silly.

"If you are worried about being embarrassed to get them, just have him buy them. If he won't, then just remember that the person at the register will most likely respect you for being more safe than sorry, and not even remember that you came in there a week from now."<br /> <br /> If you can't suck up your embarrassment and be mature about it and buy c.ondoms, then you aren't ready for sex.

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True. I think what she meant was that she wasn't ready, and now she is.<br /> <br /> Always make sure you're BOTH ready. My stupid little cousin is what.. 14? And she's having sex already! It's ridiculous, she's a pretentious little brat and I can't stand her, and I know it seems rude to speak ill of family but if you met her you'd be saying the same thing. Her parents won't do anything about it and aren't teaching her safe sex or putting her on birth control, but know she's been having sex. They even caught her texting her boyfriend about how she wanted to give him a b.j. and she was only 13! Ridiculous I say.<br /> <br /> Either way, she was telling me about her friend who was 14, and hanging out with a 19 year old. Knew him for about a week and had sex with him almost 5 times. Kids these days.<br /> <br /> But ajsdflkjsf. Sorry I rambled. But just make sure you're both ready before you make any decision. Make sure you have there are children here!s and or birth control, although both is preferred.

See what bothers me is this:<br /> <br /> "off course it is always<br /> "Um not right now"<br /> now i really want to :P"<br /> <br /> I don't know exactly what she is saying by the last bit. Is there a reason why he's going "not now?" And how you say" now I really want to."<br /> <br /> Do you really want to just have sex?<br /> Or lose your virginity?<br /> <br /> And, if it's either or, why?<br /> I'm not going to say, don't do it.<br /> But if you want to do it just because, then I'd say don't do it until you're ready, and so is he.<br /> <br /> I know too many people nowadays who are having sex at the age of like, 13, and it's disgusting because at that age, who is really prepared for it? Honestly.<br /> And then it becomes, like, a new fad. "oh so and so had sex when they were 14, so it's okay if I do it." And it's kinda like, No, it's not okay.<br /> <br /> I guess why this is such a big topic for me is because I'm a teen baby, parents were 17 and 18 when they had me. They were in such a rush to do things that they realized that they just weren't ready for what came after. Not just the baby, but the relationship they had. Because they had me, they had to stay together..and I kinda feel like, in my opinion, losing your virginity is something that will make you and your boyfriend be much more connected, but it can make the relationship fall apart, I think, if neither of you are ready.<br /> <br />

con.doms.

I don't exactly agree with Al. As long as it's a loving experience for both of you, and you do love eachother very much, go for it.<br /> <br /> Be safe though! there are children here!s, birth control, all that shibang. I regretted my first because I didn't love him like I love my boyfriend now. But it seems that you're in a stable relationship, and it might even make your bond grow stronger.<br /> <br /> So go for it, but get some there are children here!s first! I recommend Trojan Ecstasy. ;) Those are fun for both parties, and makes the experience a bit better. If you are worried about being embarrassed to get them, just have him buy them. If he won't, then just remember that the person at the register will most likely respect you for being more safe than sorry, and not even remember that you came in there a week from now.<br /> <br /> So overall, be safe, have fun, and take things slow. Your first time might not be that enjoyable, but it'll be with someone you love, and that's what matters. :)