06-3-2012 at 8:17 AM

/

12-28-2011 at 9:29 PM

The only really bad thing about my dad was how he always put others before me. And never spent money on me. We always had to save money when it came to me, but he would gladly borrow my best friend money for an ice cream when we went out to the pool but wouldn't borrow me any - the only time we went out to the pool ever. I've never forgiven him for that and never will. <br /> <br /> The other times I had to beg my friends and their parents to take me and sneak money for it somehow. But they stopped taking me when it became clear my parents would not in return drive their kids. <br /> <br /> As an autistic spectrum kid with lots of social issues to begin with, this basically killed all my friendships.

12-13-2011 at 8:47 PM

<i>"I remember whenever my siblings of I got out of line my father would beat us with a ladle. Or, if we were at our cabin, a paddle."</i><br /> <br /> Omg I used to get the spoon. I look back on it and I kind of laugh [not saying hitting kids is funny, it really wasn't.. and I'm not saying laugh as in literally ha-ha-funny] at how all my mom would have to do to get us to all run & hide was open the drawer to the spoon. Just that sound would send us running for under our beds lol

12-13-2011 at 6:05 PM

My father was not a nice man when I was little. I remember being terrified of him all the time. My mother has always been very kind though. <br /> <br /> I remember whenever my siblings of I got out of line my father would beat us with a ladle. Or, if we were at our cabin, a paddle. <br /> <br /> Even now he makes it very obvious that he doesn't like us. And he rarely hits us anymore. Hopefully I'll be moving out soon though.

12-12-2011 at 4:53 PM

"I never really had any bad experiences. I'm just unlucky, I guess."<br /> <br /> what?

12-12-2011 at 8:36 AM

I am so sorry to hear that everyone has had moments they never should have. I am afraid I do not have much to prove myself to be reasonably depressed.<br /> <br /> But I am. It hurts me, I hurts to know that people have it worse, And I hurts to know that my friends only ever recognize me when I am crying or when I'm scratching my arm. I never really had any bad experiences. I'm just unlucky, I guess.

10-25-2011 at 11:23 PM

The choice to contact my father has been hard for me, for the past few months. I haven't seen him since I was fifteen years old, I'm now twenty. When I was three years old, I was put in custody of my mother and was not allowed to see my father. Reason being, he had sexually abused me; while I was staying with him for a week of visitation before his rights where taken away. I had spent halloween with him and his new wife that week while my mother was with her fiance, planning her wedding. I was terrified when it happened. While I was being abused my then two year old brother lay next to me in the large bed sleeping, my father and step mother never touched him that I can recall. But they did me, after they had left the room that night I hid in my closet and cried myself to sleep until they came back to get me the next morning. I wasn't able to call or talk to my mother after he had touched me, because he knew I would tell her and she would come and get me imediatlly. So I stayed the rest of the week and my mother came to get me once his week was up with us. I was hungry, starving when she came to get me because he never let me and my brother eat while we where there. So my mother stopped to get us something to eat on the way home. After we got home I told her I was hurting, and she took me to the bathroom to look, she saw that I was red and swollen where he had been touching me the previous day. She rushed me to the hospital to get checked out and they said they couldn't tell if I had been abused or not. So for the next five or six months I went to see different psycholigists about what had happened. I was scared most of the time when I was talking to them, and I would stay quiet for long periods of time. As I grew older I forgot what had happened to me, pushed the memory back and hid it from myself. I had always known that he had hurt me in such a way but could never remember it. But when I was fifteen I decided I wanted to go see him, so I looked him up and got in contact with him and I went and spent the night with him about twelve times before I decided I was tired of him pulling out a file filled with every detail of what happened in court because I was "manipulated" by my mother to lie and get him thrown in jail.. Now that I am twenty I am debating on trying to contact him to maybe see if I can have a relationship with my father, but I am scared. I've been having vivid nightmares of what happened to me when I was three for the past four and a half months. I don't sleep much because of it, and my sex life, well I don't have one because I am shy around men because of what happened and how often the images pop into my head of my father and step mother leaning over me and touching me in such ways... I want to one day be able to sleep without waking up screaming and crying because of what happened to me but I don<br /> t think it will happen any time soon...

10-20-2011 at 3:34 PM

Wow, this has got to be a tough decision to share these pasts.<br /> <br /> A few especially broke my heart..<br /> I'd have to say I'm a fairly lucky person in the way of how my life went.<br /> <br /> So thank you all for sharing your heart-breaking experiences whether it be a long lasting or brief few.

09-22-2011 at 10:25 PM

Why does he hate me so much... I used to wonder that day after day. he loved taking his anger out on only me, not the other two. a year ago i learned why. I had always been told i was an ill baby when i was born that i had to stay in the hospital extra long because i was sick. that wasn't true.<br /><br /><br />Truth was my dad thought two kids made his family perfect. he didn't want a third, he tried hitting my mom to get rid of me while still in the womb. that didn;t work so when i was born he tried first to put me up for adoption, he demanded my mom be kept from me till i was gone. but she got through and wouldn't let them send me away. Then barely months old he tried to trade me for a car. A mustang anyway. After i was finally old enough he resorted to yelling at me, nothing i did was the right way. he hated that third child. two was perfect. for 16 years he took his anger out on only me, the third. he tried strangling me, we got a restraining order against my own father. But the court said he had a right to his kid's. so we had to visit on the weekends no matter how much i begged.<br /><br /><br />When my sister stole $50 from his new girlfriend he stripped me down to make sure it was me who took it. but my sister finally confessed. he seemed disappointed.<br /><br /><br />When i was 16 he let his girlfriend start yelling at me and hitting me. the only thing i had during those last years with him was my dog, and they tried to take him from me. I slapped her back when she tried to take him from my arms.<br /><br /><br />For the first time in my life i fought back. I left that day and haven't looked back. Now my life is on track and i'm planning to go to college soon.

09-15-2011 at 3:40 AM

I dont understand why my dad says the things he does. Today we went and filled up propane tanks, put them in the back of the car & were driving home. My dad was about to light a cigarette when I said to him "dad, are you sure it's safe to be smoking here?" and he was all "yeah, why not" and I said "because I still smell the fumes in the car" and his reply was "oh well, ive lived long enough, I wouldn't care if we blew up, we'd all just be blood splatters on the windows". Then he fake-threw a match into the back of the car and made an explosion sound.<br><br>Made me really depressed today. I really wish he would stop. Whenever I confront him about it he yells at me and pulls the "I'm going to abandon you" card.

08-31-2011 at 7:15 AM

My mother is a wretched excuse for a human being. The only thing she <i>hasn't</i> done to my brothers and I is molest us. I despise her utterly and often find myself wishing death on her.<br /> <br /> This thread still made me cry. I'm so sorry, all of you.

07-19-2011 at 7:26 AM

Thanks Gamzee

07-18-2011 at 11:32 AM

<i>"I wish i could just go back and warn my seven or eight year old self"</i><br><br>What happened to you wasn't your fault

07-17-2011 at 7:10 AM

The way he abused me was he touched me,i will never forget,i wish i could,i wish i could forget his face. I wish i could just go back and warn my seven or eight year old self

07-17-2011 at 7:06 AM

I have not been abused in any way by my real parents but by my mom's last boyfriend. I would not wish t on anyone that they be abused,it is horrible and life changing.It happened when i was either seven or eight and i still have nightmares to this day. I don't usually tell anybody about it,but it feels good to sometimes.<br /> My nightmares wake me up around four in the morning some nights. Then i can't get to sleep again for awhile.My mom does not realize it still effects me but oh well. I can picture the guy's face anytime during the day. It haunts my sleep and my dreams.<br /> If you have been abused i am very sorry it happened to you i know what it feels like.

07-11-2011 at 5:05 AM

I tend to stay in my room all day, every day [which would explain why I'm always on Alacrity, really] because I can't stand my dad's constant criticism and verbal abuse.<br>If he sees me, he'll start. He knows once he starts I retreat back to my room so he'll criticize that. He'll pick at the fact that I sit in my room all day [which is directly because of him and he knows this] as an excuse to call me a failure and to "return to reality".<br>He was interrogating me today, calling me a dumbass and calling me baking "making a mess".<br>I told him that that's not how parents should treat their children and how it makes me feel, but he continues. It's almost as if he does it as a way to take his anger out on me, because he won't do it to my brother [because my brother will harass him back and be incredibly obnoxious and loud and force my dad to give up and go to bed] and he won't do it to my sister [because she's basically an angel in his eyes]. We rarely have casual father-son talks, but when we do it's because either his friends aren't coming over that night, my sister is out or my brother is harassing him so much he just sits outside.<br>I really don't know what to do. I don't know how to make him stop. He's been doing it for years.<br>What should I do? ]:

06-23-2011 at 11:06 PM

Not to fully explain Tibby but I have the same problem. My brother is older though and 20, he doesn't even have a permit and cannot get a job, he dropped out of school after failing twice and only does things that makes it worse for him. My mom does nothing to get rid of him and it just makes me cry something the problems that he cases me. <br /> I've learned to laugh at him when ever he starts yelling, swearing and hitting things just at how he over reacts.<br /> <br /> Being in all honesty though I wish he was dead already or gone.

06-22-2011 at 7:51 PM

I have a similar situation as Ice wolf. My father cares about me and my brother more than anyone else in the world. And in-fact has risked his own health for us. Which I wouldn't see why any other dad wouldn't do. My mother and me are on good terms, but I begged my dad to take me when they divorced. But he refused since my brother was unwilling to come with me. I had no problems with my parents, cousins or any aunts or uncles. The problem was my brother. And I feel its my fault hes this way towards me. <br /> <br /> It started probably when I was 9 and is still going on 14 years later.. He would call me mean names, kick me in places that..I shouldn't mention and pick on my constantly. Hes five years younger than me; I have fought back but, it seems to only make it worse. When I was 9 he started to call me ugly-pants, or stupid face. I thought it was just because he was only 4 and was confused about the world. But it soon became a lot worse. He was called me swear words, or pinch me in places (I don't think I need to mention exact names.). I would tell my mother (Since my father moved out at this time.) but she would only blame it on me. It was my fault, that he was mad at me. But I was only 12 or 13. I was a little girl. He would give me dirty looks or tell all of my friends that I was a geek or that I was much fatter than I looked. This ruined my confidence. To the point where I would lie that I didn't do a project, so I didn't have to go up and speak (In front of the whole class.). I also was picked on at school. Main reason was because I was white. They'd also call me short, and kick me, beat me in some cases, and a few times push my head into the dirt until I screamed loud enough. After Middle school, High school was pretty good to me. I started working, made friends. But my little brother kept on the abuse. He stopped touching me but would still make me feel like a fat geek. That also let up to my eat disorder. I don't like to talk about that though. I stay away from my brother at all cost's. And I mostly see my step sister (Who love me) and my father (Who also loves me). <br /> <br /> Its nice to finally get that out.. or some of it at least.

06-20-2011 at 11:40 PM

Being abused by parents, boyfriends, or others is not what someone would probably wish for. It sometimes hurts to talk about a touchy subject, but may also feel right to let it out.<br /> <br /> But, I have to say, I've been abused by my parents before. It clearly started out when I was about 12-14. That was about the time we were having money issues. Yes, I've been hit, as in a punch to the head by my parents. At that time they went out every night, and came back drunk. I can't think of one night that they came home sober. But one night, from coming home from the bar, drunk and all, they were in a severe car accident. My father died at the scene and my mom was severly hurt. She was in the hospital for about 5 weeks, when she got out she left me alone. Of course, I had no siblings. <br /> But at my mothers hospital bedside and my fathers funeral, I cried. I cried, in agony and saddness of loosing my father and seeing my mother like that. I cried because of a thing called Un-conditional love. Even though they abused me in my teen years, I still loved them even when I thought I didn't. I eventually moved in with my BFF and her family.<br /> Of course, I was not in chat the moment this subject may have came up.<br /> <br /> But bragging that you got it worse is aweful. You may have got it worse, but there is no need to brag about the pain you suffered. <br /> <br /> ^_^ - Ashanti

06-15-2011 at 4:08 AM

When I was in 6th grade I got my first real boyfriend we dated for a month. Then he started trying to kiss me every time I hugged him. He went for my lips I turned away. He began to be abuseive. He forced me to say I love you he forced me to hug him. I hated it. He sometimes tried to touch me inappropitely. I was scared to break up with him. My friend told me to go to the gudience consuler. I did. I got the courge and broke up with him. From then on I made sure any guy I dated wanted to take it slow.