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Learning what Love is

Heyo all, this is sort of a thread that is OK for the general board, but I'd like more adult talk which is why I'm posting it here. For a quick back history, I'm 21 (almost 22), the guy I'm going to be talking about is 24, we are in no way children :)

Basically, this is the first time I've ever been in a relationship where I've actually thought of, dreamed of, a "forever." I've had plenty of relationships before, but I always assumed we'd be broken up within a few months/a year, and never thought past that. I thought that way at first with this guy, but slowly my thoughts have changed.

Now, before I get too far into this: we've only been dating a little over a month, but I've known him over a year. I'm not talking that I'm considering marriage already or anything, but I am thinking about that in a LONG TERM sense. Which is what is amazing to me. I've never, ever considered moving in with any previous boyfriends, but with him I mean... it's to the point where I'm trying to decide if I'd be OK moving to where he lives or if I want him to move to me or if we want to live in some random place. Again, this isn't immediate or anything.

We are taking it slow, especially because we both do live in separate areas. We are only about 5 hours from each other, but I don't have a license or a car and he has to use his car to drive his dad and two sisters to work and back so he can't exactly leave. It has been really hard for us both, as he's trying to find a day time job (hard for him due to some mistakes he's made) and I already have a job working 3rd shift (10pm-7am) so we don't get to talk all that much, which sucks.

However, we do have a date set for our first meet-up :D I just have to decide if I want to fly there or take a Greyhound. I've never flown before, and I've never taken that long of a bus trip (over 12 hours on the bus Dx) so I have NO idea what the better option is...

Even though we do have some rough spots we're dealing with, I have told him and myself repeatedly that as long as we can make it through the bad times, it's just going to make the good times that much sweeter.

I'm sending him a "care package" soon, as soon as I manage to find time to buy the stuff I want to put into it haha. I'm really excited for what he says when he gets it :D

Anyway, I guess the main 'point' of this thread (besides swooning over how in love I am xD) was to see if anyone else has had a moment where they've noticed their thought process changed from a few months ahead to a "forever." How did it turn out for you? Are you still with that person? Any advice or suggestions you have? This is the first time I've felt this way!

Replies


I've known him well over a year, we've only been <i>dating</i> for a month. I know that it's silly to think that far ahead, and I know that if we reach the stage where we live together we may notice quirks and such that we dislike- but that comes with the territory. You work things like that out together, or at least the best you can. As it is, like I said, I'm not exactly making marriage plans or anything, I just think it's kind of amazing that I could see myself marrying him in the future. I'm definitely not a fast-moving person, and we probably won't move in with each other (if we do) until we've been dating at least a year. I just think it's kind of... amazing?... how I'm actually CONSIDERING stuff like that. I mean, I've never thought of moving in with someone before, and here I am thinking 'well maybe in a year or two...,' which I've never done before :P
To be honest,(this may sound harsh) I would avoid thinking about long-term stuff with a dude you've only known for such a little time.<br /> You only REALLY know someone when you've lived with them for a while (like room-mates)<br /> I truly understand the "forever" feeling, but I would advise thinking like that until you've been together for a couple years :P

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